Q. I have had twenty years of therapy with several psychiatrists. There was always a secret that I could not bring myself to talk about. My psychiatrist died, so I found a new one. I have seen him in expressive psychotherapy for a month, but presently he is away for two weeks. The secret, which I have been able to discuss with him concerns my “others.” I have always had “others” who have served to protect me in socially awkward situations or when I became anxious. I always knew there was a terrible secret about me and the house I grew up in. Nevertheless, these protectors let me see who they have been protecting all these years recently. I found out that I was abused when I was an infant to about four or six years old.
I am curious whether I could have DID. These “others” are not, I believe, fully developed personalities with stories. They seem to be primitive fragments. I have always called on them to help me. They are protectors, bad ones, and now, this injured child. I certainly do not feel like a “Sybil”. Is it possible for one with BPD, OCPD, to have DID, or are these symptoms indeed not DID?
A. You are going through a crisis time and must maintain your relationship with your psychiatrist. There are no easy answers, although I would strongly advise reading “Embraced By the Light” by Betty Eadie – it often helps people like you to make peace with your experiences and life much easier.
You can have DID and sprain your ankle, have strep throat or appendicitis as well. There is nothing about the BPD or OCPD which prevents the DID.
I don’t treat many DID patients, but have a few. The keys are keeping you feeling safe (the use of motion sensors at night can be of use), controlling emotional seizures (I’ve had the most success with Tegretol combined with an SSRI such as Prozac), and the use of a chronic antipsychotic medication such as Risperdal during your crisis time.
It’s crucial for you to understand that you have nothing to be embarrassed about, that you were a victim – not the cause of your abuse, and that you must move on to recover.