QUESTION:
Dear Dr. Heller,
I figured out that my friend was suffering from BPD, all on my own from observation and reading. My friend raged at me and is not talking to me anymore. I’m concerned about what my reaction should be if she ever comes back to me once she gets back in the white? Should I let her know that I know and understand? Or?
Thank you.
ANSWER:
Once an individual with the BPD believes you’re a bad person, it can be very difficult to change their mind. Memories from a psychotic rage are usually incorrect, but they “feel real” to an individual with the BPD. The human brain is incapable of distinguishing actual events from those that were imagined with strong feelings. They both are “remembered” as real. Unless the individual is willing to be serious about treatment the wisest approach may be to say nothing and just smile and be pleasant. http://pks.947.myftpupload.com/AskDoc/q1.htm can give you assistance in helping your friend.